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5 Dangers of an Identity Crisis

October 7, 2020

 

Living in today’s time, we are especially no stranger to the dangers and hostilities around us. Attacks are being made everywhere we look. We see hate at our doorsteps, we scroll past it on social media. We hear of disasters, devastation, and horrible crimes on the news. We are warned to look out for suspicious activity and to guard ourselves against hurts and disease. But it’s rare to hear that we need protection from ourselves. 

 

We can be our own worst enemies without even knowing it. We fall victim to our own minds when we don’t know our true identity. In case you didn’t know, there is a war going on for who we are.  

 

Maybe you define your identity based on your environment – where you’re living, where you go to school, where you work. Perhaps you define your identity by who you’re dating, whether or not you’re married or if you have kids. Or maybe you base your identity on your political party, your social groups, or your church. 

 

But if you had nothing, who would you be?

 

 

Hope is not lost if you answered that question with “no one” or “I don’t know.” If you’ve come across this article, it is possible that your true identity may have been compromised. It may be suppressed under layers of hurtful experiences, half-truths, spiritual damage, and false beliefs about who you think you are. My goal is to help you fully walk in your royal confidence by uncovering the dangers of a lacking identity. 

 

Danger 1: You’re always after “the next thing.” 

 

Are you constantly chasing the next temporary high? Are you exasperated and defeated when the satisfaction doesn’t come?

 

Goals and dreams are exhilarating, but your identity can not be formulated in them! Life is not meant to be a ceaseless rush towards “the next thing.” We’re not meant to be hamsters on wheels. But, oftentimes we don’t have the peace to be present. Instead, we allow feelings of unsettledness to wash over us as we lay paralyzed or frenzied. 

 

But what if I told you we are created to enjoy the in-betweens? That we were meant to sit back and breathe? The high points in life are always something to look forward to but it cannot be all that we live for. Basing your purpose on things that don’t last forever brings about a form of instability and insecurity that we could very much live without.

 

There is a cure that leads to contentment and it begins with knowing your true identity.

 

Danger 2: Feelings or beliefs of unworthiness.

 

You may often find that behind a false sense of identity is the weighty curtain of unworthiness.

 

Because you don’t recognize your true worth, you look for it in all the wrong places. You seek acceptance and approval at school, at work, in your career, with your family and friends. The media tells you to look one way and so you do everything in your power to best obtain the look. But then the guy you’re interested in tells you he’s not into that so you wipe off the slate and try to start over. You desperately attempt to fit in so that you obtain the admiration you desire. 

 

But here’s the thing: if we live our lives at the mercy of humankind, we will constantly be disappointed. 

 

You crave applause but there is One that has long given you a standing ovation. You’ve been wanting someone to tell you that you are worthy of being loved and you are. This was proven on a cross centuries ago!

 

It’s time to break the mold of yourself – the one that makes you feel that you need to be someone else to get that guy, to be accepted, to land the deal. Putting on an act blocks your potential to emanate your God-given light. You will quickly find yourself in a place where you don’t know what is real and what is pretend. 

 

But you can gain a sense of self. You are way more than a fleeting trend, your appearance, position, title or accolade here on earth. So much more.

 

Danger 3: Lack of intimacy. 

 

A lack of identity keeps you from getting to know others on a deeper level. It keeps you from truly experiencing yourself and most importantly, it keeps you from greater intimacy with God. 

 

Committing to doing everything except embracing who you are called to be is the pathway to a lackluster life, more insecurities, a lack of direction, and even depression.

 

The desire to be liked and loved is natural. However, as we saw how in danger number two, it is a problem when we utilize that desire as the force for pleasing people. 

 

Do you find yourself bending to the will of others? The next time you find yourself jumping to do the next thing, understand that you were not meant to be easily malleable. It’s time to learn your authentic self and the best way to do so is by understanding your original design. It’s by getting to know the One who created you. 

 

You will not sacrifice your authenticity when you are certain of your identity. 

 

Danger 4: You won’t know what you stand for. 

 

“Just be yourself,” they say.

 

You’ve probably heard this a trillion times and thought, “well, what is that supposed to mean  when I don’t even know myself?!” Or maybe, you’re not comfortable with yourself so you rather be anything but that. Or perhaps, you are simply too afraid to show who you really are and what you stand for. 

 

There are many opinions not only in our world but on the world wide web and we have to accept that we may get attacked for not agreeing with the masses. What’s helpful is knowing that we are called to be set apart.  

 

You will find frustration and a lack of fulfillment when you are not in-line with your values. It’s confusing being unaware of your core values, especially in a social climate that is constantly changing. But the good news is that there is a place where you can build yourself on a strong, immovable foundation. 

 

Danger 5: You are not in God’s will. 

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Living life out of purpose is the worst place to be and that is exactly where a lack of identity takes you. You’ll quickly find yourself getting into careers and relationships that weren’t intended for you. If you ever wondered why these people or places aren’t a good fit and don’t make you happy, have you considered you’re not in alignment with God’s will?

 

You were created with a purpose, on purpose and you are not fully living if you haven’t tapped into your God-given potential!

 

It’s imperative we understand why on earth we are here. It’s up to you to choose to answer God’s call or dismiss it. Forfeiting our purpose will lead us to feel there is something missing. Forfeiting our purpose wedges a huge gap in our identity. 

 

Life is constantly changing and so are we, whether we realize or not.

 

When we look in the mirror, we shouldn’t be uncomfortable or shocked at what we see…nor should we punish or ignore that person! We should be able to recognize and embrace who we are with solid, God-given confidence. You don’t have to live in confusion, anxiety, striving, comparison, or frustration on your journey to embracing who you are.

 

So… who are you exactly?

 

A creation of the King. 

 

The King of all Kings. He is the One who says you don’t have to live for the next thing because He will give you joy in the midst of your nothingness. The One who makes you worthy and righteous and calls you loved when He died on the cross and rose again. The One who bridged the gap so that you could have a connection with God. The One who is immovable, unshakeable, and is willing to be your strong foundation. The One who placed you here for a purpose.

 

His name is Jesus. You have the opportunity to become His royal heir when you welcome Him into your life. He gives you a new identity when you choose Him above all else and dedicate your life to living as His light. 

 

It’s not going to be easy but I would be more than honored to help you on your journey! If you are ready to walk in the authority and worth of royal identity, you can purchase my new book, Claim Your Crown, as your personal guide! The free devotional is available on the YouVersion Bible app. I also have numerous resources available such as free printables and the royal confidence series on YouTube!

 

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             MEET TARAH-LYNN

Welcome! I’m the creator of Adorned in Armor & Dressed for Battle Podcast! As a business owner, fashion writer for Teen Vogue & The Haitian Times, former pageant queen and author (#ClaimYourCrown), I equip women with the weapons to live victorious lives, encourage them to glorify God with their gifts and to embrace their crowns in Christ. Armor up with me @adornedinarmor!

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