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Life, Medgina's Musings

THE WAY YOU SHOULD HANDLE DISRESPECT

October 4, 2016

Hey guys, it’s Medge!

 

And I’m here this time to express with you how…recently, I have been disrespected more often than I’d like.

 

Yes, the disrespect!

 

I know that it’s all a test to see how I will react. Am I the same old tell-it-how-it-is Medge or have I turned a new leaf?

 

It was once super easy to deliver truth with all the sharpness it might have. I don’t sugarcoat — everything just is or it isn’t. I was able to deflect the disrespect and store up the way I truly felt by getting straight to the point.

 

As of late though, I have found myself questioning what I once viewed as normal: my habits, how I react, and the decisions I make. And as I’m changing, the things that are “exactly as they were” point out a glaring truth — I need a set of boundaries, a golden rule.

 

It was always hard for me to understand why the love that I gave was fully embraced, yet also prone to be taken advantage of by those very people.  While treating people the same way they treated me was second nature at one point, I can’t allow it to be that way today. I’m not the same person anymore.

 

Taking a very much needed break from school, I went home and finally had time to reflect on this.  Sunday, my pastor spoke on the “golden rule” which focuses on true love and positive, active behavior. The scripture was on Matthew 7:12, “So in everything, do to others what you would have them do to you.” That should be the golden rule.

 

As much as you love yourself, when someone hurts you, recognize how you would want to be treated vice versa. We crave the action/proof of love. The role switch is not easy. Some days, the golden rule will suck because while you might be giving the love and positivity: it’s not guaranteed that you will get it back.

 

“Truths and roses have thorns to them” is a quote I remind myself with when I realize that the love I give doesnt come back in full. The truth is, it hurts when what you would blindly do for someone isn’t guaranteed or acknowledged. Disrespect will come when you see others doing to you what you wouldn’t do to them.

 

People may not have the same heart as you and instead of getting righteous about it, just accept it! React accordingly and don’t treat them any differently from what you would want.

 

People may not have the same heart as you. Instead of getting righteous, just accept it! Click To Tweet

 

You control the way you feel. Get wiser, see the way things actually are no matter how hard it is. Golden rule: don’t ever play yourself!

 

Golden rule: don't ever play yourself! Click To Tweet

 

The most amazing thing about seeking love is that God literally overflows with it in pure abundance (way more than we think or deserve)!

You don’t need the applause and sometimes you won’t get a thank you but you are never alone in feeling under-appreciated. On top of that, you have someone who will forever make you feel more than enough.

 

Some have a jaded view on love and relationships but that’s them . Don’t let the world turn your heart cold. We can’t change people — they owe us nothing! Getting hurt sucks and being disrespected? Even worse. Take a breath, access and adjust: you know what’s worth it.

 

So how should you handle taking disrespect?

 

Quite simply, by showing grace.

 

This by no means, shape or form says that your emotions aren’t validated or warranted! It also doesn’t call for you to be a door mat. It’s the effective, genuine and assertive way to let people know how you feel so it won’t happen again. But that’s a convo for another time 😉

 

Continue to be the light you were called to be.  Stay golden.

Much love,

Medge <3

medginamusings

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4

Comments

  1. Barrie

    October 4, 2016 at 10:14 pm Reply

    Really great post. I needed this tonight. I was disrespected at work today, and needed to be reminded of this. It made me so angry. I didn’t know how to act tomorrow. But now I do. Thank you.

    1. Medgina Saint-Elien

      October 31, 2016 at 4:09 pm Reply

      I’m really happy this could help! Hopefully you can use this technique in the future 🙂

  2. NephZaddy :)

    October 6, 2016 at 7:30 am Reply

    Medge spittin’ facts!

    1. Medgina Saint-Elien

      October 31, 2016 at 4:09 pm Reply

      forever and always 😉

  3. Lanae Bond

    October 6, 2016 at 2:03 pm Reply

    I know my mom told me long ago that you can help how other act but you can help how you react to them! As I am getting older I realizing she is so right!

    1. Medgina Saint-Elien

      October 31, 2016 at 4:11 pm Reply

      Your mother is very wise! The way we react matters 🙂

  4. Steve

    October 6, 2016 at 7:38 pm Reply

    I think there are various levels of disrespect. Some of the nonsense I deal with is not always about disagreement of opinions. Honestly, I have no desire to argue with anyone. Healthy discussions, yes. Arguments, I will pass. I am too old and too tired to argue. I have raised my children to respect adults and authority, but if you need to question it, do it respectfully. They have been taught that you do the right thing because it is the right thing to do. Turning the other cheek is hard. Letting go of an emotional response it hard to do. But then again, nothing that is worthwhile is every easy. Reading this blog is pretty amazing. But it comes from the mind of an amazing person. So there 🙂

    I shall leave you Megs with a few quotes>

    “What man is a man who does not make the world better?”

    Be without fear in the face of your enemies. Be brave and upright that God may love thee. Speak the truth always even if it leads to your death. Safeguard the helpless and do no wrong.”

    Keep it going kiddo!

    1. Medgina Saint-Elien

      October 31, 2016 at 4:15 pm Reply

      Thank you so much! You always know the right words to say 🙂

      You practice what you preach and that has helped me.

  5. Stacie

    October 7, 2016 at 11:24 am Reply

    It is really hard to show grace when you see a pattern of disrespect taking place. But no matter what, we still have to continue to forgive. 70 X 7, right?

    1. Medgina Saint-Elien

      October 31, 2016 at 4:17 pm Reply

      Exactly! It isn’t easy but the result is worth it. Thanks Stacie 🙂

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